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eight_ft_Long_Scarves
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Name: Emily
Gender: Female
Interests: Jesus Christ, Music, nature, adventures, new seasons in life, my family, my friends, ministry, camp, concerts, hanging out, laughing, reading the Word, snowboarding, riding my horses, traveling, new experiences, and a lot of other things.
Occupation: Student
Industry: Art
Message: message meEmail: email me
MSN: moon_tide36@hotmail.com
AIM:  ready.for.battle
Member Since:
3/3/2004
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You know its been a while when it takes you four tries to get your password right.
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My heart is full. Like an over-stuffed trunk full of suitcases, games and pringles on the way to Platte River. The funny thing is, right when it feels like i can't hold any more... Your love stretches my heart. My human heart, physically about the size of my fist, sometimes feels like its stretching beyond my skin. It feels like there's a mini hurricane inside my chest.
I am blessed beyond measure.
I. am. blessed. beyond. measure.
I don't recognize that enough.
I look forward to the year that awaits right around the corner. The opportunities, the challenges, the scariness of the unknown... i look forward to it all because i've been Promised. And next December when i look back on this post, i'll either laugh or cry... maybe a little of both. When i remember how silly my fears were. When i remember how i had no clue of this or that. When i remember how much i've learned or discovered.
My heart is full.
Its time to sleep.
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wow its been a while...
i'm not even sure what to say exactly... i'm going back and forth between coming up with something incredibly profound, something firggin hilarious, going over whats happened since last i posted (quickly decided that would take way too much of my time), talking about whats new, mentioning how my day went... wow.. we'll see how this turns out:
I was cleaning my room again today and sorting through some old journels... i found old pictures and old quotes along with old feelings. And started feeling incredibly reflective (of course.. thats always what happens when you read old journels). As i was reading, i was trying to decide whether to laugh or cry. Should i laugh because of my ignorance? Or cry because of my ignorance? I have saved everything i've written since i've started journeling.. (its becoming an issue with space). Its crazy what can happen/what you can learn in only a couple years... Cliches become dull and soon afterward annoying. You learn to push yourself into what you want to become instead of just waiting for it to happen. You're suddenly aware of what really happened during your childhood compared to just thinking divorce is the norm. You realize it takes so much work on friendships and relationships, some of them are worth it, some aren't. New Year's resolutions are something forgot about after january.
I'm becoming a woman and it scares me but i'm excited.
This is a glimse of Emily Maiefski's mind tonight: reflective, aware, choppy, random, yet calm.
I'm tired.
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"Before Jeremiah knew God, God knew Jeremiah: 'Before I formed you in the womb I knew you.' This turns every question we have about God around. We think God is an object about which we have questions. We are curious about God. We make inquiries about God. We read books about God. We get into late night bull sessions about God. We drop into church from time to time to see what is going on with God. We indulge in an occasional sunset or symphony to cultivate a feeling of reverence for God.
But that is not the reality of our lives with God.
Long before we ever got around to asking questions about God, God has been questioning us. Long before we got interested in the subject of God, God subjected us to the most intensive and searching knowledge. Before it ever crossed our minds that God might be important, God singled us out as important. Before we were formed in the womb, God knew us.
We are known before we know.
This realization has a practical result: no longer do we run here and there, panicked and anxious, searching for the answers to life. Our lives are not puzzles to be figured out. Rather, we come to God, who knows us and reveals to us the truth of our lives. The fundamental mistake is to begin with ourselves, and not God. God is the center of which all life develops. If we use our ego as the center from which to plot the geometry of our lives, we will live eccentrically.
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My identity does not begin when i begin to understand myself. There is something previous to what i think about myself, and it is what God thinks of me. That means that everything i think and feel is by nature a response, and the one whom i respond is God. i never speak the first word. i never make the first move.
Jeremiah's life didn't start with Jeremiah. Jeremiah's salvation didn't start with Jeremiah. Jeremiah's truth didn't start with Jeremiah. He entered the world in which the essential parts of his existence were already ancient history.
So do we."
-Run With The Horses by Eugene H. Peterson
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Why is it so hard to put grace above your current circumstances?
Why is it so hard to forgive someone who hasn't apologized?
God, i just need a taste of your grace. Thats it. Thats all i need... and ill be lifted back up on my feet.
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"And these are but the outer fringe of His works; and how faint a whisper we hear of him! Who, then, can understand the thunder of His POWER?"
-Job 26:14
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